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Tanga women pass down ideas to girls on how a wife should be sexually skilled and sexually available for her husband. Maua Abdallah, 40, for one is a proud native of the region whose only problem is that sometimes their reputation has acquired negative connotations with talk of them being perpetual man-snatchers and prostitutes.
On this particular evening, she sits with four elderly women on a mat on the veranda of a ten-roomed block on which she and her husband rent a single room. Her husband had travelled but he was expected back that evening. And she pointed out it was a good time for me to see how a Tanga woman prepares for her husband. Their room was small but neat with the sole medium-sized bed covered with a white bedspread on which Jasmine flowers had been sprinkled. From below the bed, incense sticks released swirls of smoke whose scent did not escape my nostrils as it struggled to beat off the humid, dusty air from outside.
A patterned mat was laid out on the seemingly clean adobe floor with several dishes containing different types of food sitting on it. The pretty, woolen-knit dish covers did nothing to tame the sweet aroma of the food that escaped from under them. My luck was to get to taste some of the delicious dishes prepared for the lucky man. As Maua put some food for me on a plate the other elderly women left but her niece, Mariam, 19, who got married just last year and her friend Amina Amadi, 30, divorced for three years now, stayed.
We talked about growing up female in Tanga. The lessons drilled into their minds, and into their lives, normally relate to things that any woman is ideally capable of doing and would probably want to do but somehow overlooks as too simple, too obvious, or too goofy.
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